Meeting Yourself Where You Are - Dale Darley
Meeting Yourself Where You Are

Meeting Yourself Where You Are

It’s Sunday afternoon as I sit to write this. So far today I have walked my dogs three times. I confess to not wanting to go out so often sometimes, but I am always grateful for the air and time to think. Also, today I have been making workbooks for an up and coming program. Creation and being creative is something I adore. Going for the walks lets the processes fall into place. It’s all quite magical.

There’s a cake that wants to be made. A chocolate cake – but I am lacking the requisite enthusiasm. In fact, my enthusiasm has deserted me these last few days, and I have found that I have had to push myself to get things done.

Take yesterday, I was due to renew my online art class, and I kept thinking I can’t be bothered and what’s the point and even worse I should be cleaning up. With just an hour to go, I told myself to get over me, pay and go. But I wailed to no one, in particular, what shall I paint?

Just days before I was looking at a friends art and one picture came to mind in this moment. I went in search of a picture of a fertility goddess and was pleased to find a statue to use. My inspiration returned.

A few hours later it was half done and I was pleased that I’d made the effort.

It’s easy to give up isn’t? Especially right now when we no longer have the external freedoms that we once did. I’m certainly missing my girly lunches at the coast. Though I confess a friend did make me lunch last week, and we sat looking out onto the most spectacular mountains.

All of this made me think of how can we find a space for inner peace and meet yourself where you are?

Awareness

Awareness gives you choices and understanding. When I bring attention to my body, I can hear her speaking to me, and it gives me clues about what to do next.

I use a model called the heart connection model, it started off as something I had printed off and would use either with a pendulum or use my intuition to know where to go. Now I ‘see’ the model inside of me. Each day I ask what do I need to know and I am guided to a colour and energy centre (chakra).

This super awareness of what my heart wants to tell me gives me clues about what I need to know, and I can ponder on how the messages can support me through the day. I find keywords come to me, and I turn these into questions and affirmations.

This means that every day I can let my intuition guide my awareness and push or pull me in the direction I need to go.

While I ponder I also let me awareness drift to my breathing. That’s a sure sign of what is going on.

To do: Stop what you are doing and simply notice your breath. What do you learn from this observation? And when you notice your breath and take it around your body – what else do you learn?

Where am I?

This is about taking a 360 degree view of my life via a set of life areas.

  • Health and wellbeing 
  • Learning 
  • Financial 
  • Heart and spirit 
  • Experiences 
  • Mental/emotional 
  • Love/Partner 
  • Family 
  • Friends 
  • Mission/Vision 

Within these I have a set of questions and I use a wheel of fortune – similar to a wheel of life – but called fortune as I like the idea that we are in control of our fortune/fate.

To do: This is one for your journal. Put a stake in the ground and look around. This may seem very simple, but it is, in fact, very powerful and may bring up all kinds of feelings. You must look around you and take it all in. Use the life areas to guide you. Acknowledge that this is where you find yourself. Describe where you find yourself. Consider how this feels. What do you see and what do you know about this place? 

What do I want to create?

I ask this of everyone I work with. What do you want to create could be here and now – the short term. Or sometime in the future – a timeframe that you want to choose. Some people think that this could be their legacy and it could, but in reality, your legacy is what other people value about what you leave behind, not what you think they will get.

Asking this question starts the envisioning process. It’s about what you think is possible without the confines of your I can’t language. Creation gives us the big picture and then you can come back to where you are and have an idea of what your next aligned step is.

To do: Ask what do I want to create? Put pen to paper, start with the mundane and allow the magic to flow.

How do you feel?

Meeting yourself where you are is connecting to your emotions and feelings in this moment. Do you feel angry, helpless, trapped or joyful, or light and with a sense of inner peace? I know that the people I am talking to swing between the good and the not so good almost within the same minute.

I think it’s important to sit with your feelings and notice (become aware) of what they are saying to you and why?

When you look at yourself without judgement and merely observe it is incredibly powerful. This is not the time to fix you, it’s the time to notice.

Fixing, slaying or healing can come later. I, of course, prefer to heal, rather than take a hammer to them and fix them up against the good feelings wall and declare triumphantly ha got you!

To do: Stop for a moment and write in your journal the emotion you feel and what you observe about it.

Tap into joyful moments

Even in my darkest moments, something happens to make me laugh. It’s usually one of the dogs. Perhaps I’ll be chewing my food and not paying attention and Angel decides that mmm she’d like some of that and since I wasn’t paying attention it might as well be hers. I laugh, every time she does something because she is sweet, funny and loving. Then there are the farts (usually Marley) when you are meditating – yes I do laugh.

To do: Remember to laugh at the small things. Let moments of joy seep in.

Be patient

Oh this one has caught me so many times. I find myself wanting the yuk to be over with NOW. What I have learned is things always get better and to be kind to myself. Journaling, eating cake (not all of it) and walking with the dogs always lift my mood.

I remind myself that Rome wasn’t built in a day. And that all I have to do is one thing that moves me in the direction that I want to go in. When I look back in my journal, I can see just how far I have come and that’s reason to celebrate – isn’t it.

Let go of what doesn’t serve you. What might seem important right now, often doesn’t the following day.

To do: Write in your journal and then occasionally take time to reflect. Remember to celebrate how much you have grown. Also give yourself permission to focus on what’s important.

Start where you are. Utilise what you have. Express what you need. Take one tiny step.

Start where you are. Utilise what you have. Express what you need. Take one tiny step.

Value and values

Remember your value and values. What do you value and why? Where did your ideas around value come from? Value this moment and what it teaches you about you.

What are your values? How do you know that they are? Who taught them to you? Do you own them and live by them?

Value yourself and live by your values, these two things will help you to navigate life.

Journey Of The Heart is about creating a life that you love. Could this be the start you need to make?

Dale Darley

Personal Brand Strategist and Author. I want to inspire people to get connected to their hearts, know and do what they love. For those people to become an inspiration and show others what is possible in the world. Mum to three dogs and a family of swallows. Life without cake is a life unlived.

>