Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

by | Sep 29, 2023 | Personal Development

Have you lost yourself, your purpose or your passion for something? It’s time to get out of your comfort zone. So buckle up.

I know I did. For a long while after my spine fractured, my love for helping others to write and publish books upped and left. To be honest, I was shocked because I have dedicated so much of my life and time to being a book coach and mentor. It was like a part of me didn’t want to be a part of me anymore.

It was strange but also a big relief.

So I let go of all of that and sat with myself, asking what next. What do you want – not for the rest of my life – for this part of my life?

Creativity and fun!!!

Creativity and fun was the answer. I had lost the feeling of being creative and having fun in my life and work. So, of course, I had to figure out what constituted fun for me. I think I’d forgotten how to even have fun. Creativity is not so hard, I love creating things. But I had to make sure what I was creating satisfied both things.

For one element of the fun part, I bought an Alexa, and I have sung and danced in the kitchen a lot – getting connected to my wild inner child has been so much fun.

But while figuring things out, I kept fighting the whole writing thing. You may find the same thing. You know you need to move in another direction, but for some reason, you are superglued to the past.

I sat in my creative space pondering (a lot) and asking questions, and in this space, I gave birth to creating e-books, journal prompt cards, Canva templates and a few other things. Some of these stayed as products and some didn’t. As I worked on my e-books, I did get back into writing, and I also found it hard to answer some of the questions I was posing to my readers. Doh!

As my mum says, ‘healer, heal thyself’… Go, mummy coach!!!

I made myself feel very uncomfortable, and I think this is important to get to what you want (for now) and reconnect to the person you feel you have lost. Also, to grieve who you once were and let her go.

What also got me moving was being trapped in the house because of the horrible heat. This summer (I’m in Spain) has been the pits. Sitting with the dogs and sweltering sparked a desire in me to do something different and mix things up. But the heat just whacked me out, so add frustration to that. I got comfortable with afternoon siestas and complaining :-).

I think that we gravitate naturally towards being comfortable. It makes sense, right? If you’re offered a chair, you’ll probably head for the seat which looks perfect for you. I know I would want extra cushions to make the experience just right. I like safety, security and comfort – except when I don’t…

Mostly, we like things to stay the same or sameish. That means we follow routines that we can do without thinking. As a result, days without surprises are easily managed, even if they are boring.

My summer days involved leaving the house at first light to walk the dogs, coming back for breakfast and then immediately going for another walk. I do at least have the opportunity to space the walks out at other times of the year – like now, as it gets cooler. Then it’s to my office for work. The evening involves two more walks late in the day and then watching Netflix – when I am supposed to be writing a novel.

Being stuck inside has stopped me in my tracks and pushed me to review many things. This summer, I found that the more I considered my life, the more I felt that my comfort zone was potentially becoming my greatest prison cell.

It was time for a change.

Comfort Is All About Staying Safe

Comfort is about predictable things and life without demands, and I am not putting it down.

Comfort can be good. You know what you are doing and what’s expected, you have time to learn things (if you can find the motivation), there’s time for social life, and you can stay invisible.

But if you want to grow and succeed, you need to open your eyes to why you love this place of comfort. Comfort keeps us where we are, giving us no reason to challenge ourselves, learn new things, or discover what we can do.

I needed a challenge, and you may need one too.

You may not know why you are staying safe. Safety is a basic need; let’s face it, who wants to give up that lovely feeling of being safe?

Well, me, for starters. I was feeling lethargic despite getting things done. My energy was being sapped, and I knew I needed something to relight the fire.

I knew it was time to try a different approach.

Getting Out Of The Comfort Zone Into Your Creative Space

Examine Your Discomfort

First, I made a list of all the things that felt comfortable and easy. Then, list of everything that was making me feel uncomfortable. Next was reflecting on why these things made me feel uncomfortable.

Why Are You Ready to Step Out of Your Comfort Zone?

This was a big question. I was ready because book coaching had lost its sparkle. This needed to change, and I wanted to work on shorter, fun projects. But I also knew I needed to do something different that I was passionate about. This was about combining my love for creativity, passion and purpose.

Reflect On Discomfort

Reflection is such a positive exercise. I sat with my emotions and examined what and why I felt stuck. The biggest key to getting through this step is honesty, so be prepared to be truthful as you step into this journey.

Where Do You See Yourself?

Envisioning and having a vision are powerful. However, for a powerful vision to manifest, you need to declutter. This is the time to declutter, let things go, and focus on what you want. I let so much go, and honestly, it is liberating.

To succeed against a challenge, such as facing what is in your discomfort zone, you need to see yourself succeeding. This step has a lot of power, so it must not be skipped.

Do Things That Put You In The Creative Space

To discover new things, you need to change what you are doing. For example, read a book in a different genre or walk a different way, try something artistic, knit a dog jumper, volunteer, dance, listen to different music and play.

You will see life from a new perspective by doing some or all of these things.

Prepare

Let things go, and give yourself space to prepare for what is to come. Keep embracing discomfort and moving through the discovery and clarification stage for your new thing.

If you are at this stage, it’s important to give time to it and make intentional choices with every action. This kind of preparation will take you right where you need to go.

Just so you know, I am doing the work. Remember the novel… Now that I have binned the wrong idea and found a fun and creative idea, this next month is the big preparation followed by massive action with NaNoWriMo, and my fellow writers are doing the same. So, no excuses, then…

Start Somewhere

You might not know where to start. However, examining your discomfort and feeling that you are in the chaos zone will have already highlighted the areas where you don’t feel confident.

Start with a list, gather your resources and do something different to open up the creative space you need. Be in the present moment, and ideas will come to you.

If you lack ideas, talk to people who have accomplished similar things and see what advice they can give. A mentor might even be a good idea, as they’ll steer you toward what you need most.

Start Small

Outside of the novel. My start small was a small eBook called A Journaling Journey to Your Heart’s Desires. Which led to the Memoir Made Easy planner. Each part of the workbook I broke down into chunks because each chunk was something small. Each part presented a challenge which I relished.

The key? Keep going. Small steps should happen, one right after the other. Practice moving into the discomfort zone daily until it becomes a habit to challenge yourself.

Small victories coupled with frequent attempts will help discomfort feel not so uncomfortable. If you’re consistent, in a very short amount of time, you’ll discover that what used to be the discomfort zone has turned into another bigger and better comfort zone.

Commit

Finally, the last step is to commit to this process. Like me, you will have to revisit these steps repeatedly whenever you push yourself in a new direction.

I’m committed to going through this process regularly so that I can enjoy being in the creative space of the discomfort zone.

To succeed in life, you can’t just confront the discomfort zone once or even twice.

Remember, a comfort zone is a great place to recharge, but sooner or later, you’ll want to venture out again, stretching the boundaries as far as you can make them go. How else will you ever reach your full potential?

This is the key, though, isn’t it? You want to reach your full potential in life. You want to succeed beyond your wildest imaginings and live the life you deserve. This all starts here by stepping willingly into the discomfort zone and seeing where it takes you.

What Next?

Start A Passion Project

What would you love to do?

Me, it’s the novel – This dratted novel. It will get written… It will 🙂

If you are feeling like you want some motivation and need to brainstorm – book a call. I can guide you this crossroads stage into reinvention and less discomfort.

Let your journal be a mirror reflecting your true self, unfiltered and raw, capturing the essence of your journey through life.

Dale Darley
Reinvent Yourself: Embracing Change to Unlock Your True Potential

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